Greetings Dear Readers!
I hope you are well and wearing something pretty. First, a shout out to Nathan, who suggested a blog topic about lingerie. Thanks, Nathan. What a fun topic! Because the word “lingerie” covers such a large array of clothing, I’m going to limit this blog to the topic of panties – a topic I know you are all totally into, as am I.
The great majority of us got our start in cross-dressing with panties. A good number of us started by exploring mom’s or sister’s panty drawer and then progressed to buying our own. Some folks, once they are adults, limit themselves to underdressing under their everyday male clothing, while others of us progressed on to bras, hosiery, and finally outer clothing.
I was a late starter, having begun with underdressing in middle age. Do you remember the thrill of that first time you slipped into a pair of panties? I was so amazed by the choices. With men’s underwear, you have a choice of tighty whities or boxers. Of course, you could expand that to uh, tighty whities or boxers. Of course, you can also find male thongs, usually in, of all places, swimwear. With panties, you’ve got this amazing variety of styles, colors, and fabrics. Xdress/Body Aware has a huge selection, ranging from pretty grannies to bikinis, thongs, G-strings, tap pants, tangas – ah the list goes on! And the fabrics! Lace, satin, cotton, polyester. I’m all about comfort, and men’s underwear does not begin to measure up to the comfortable styles and fabrics of panties.
It’s interesting to me that, although I’ve been underdressing for many years now (I have one pair of men’s underwear that I wear for my annual physical with my very conservative doctor) that it is still a treat every morning to pick out the day’s panties. When I wore men’s underwear, I didn’t give a thought to the selection of underwear, as they all looked the same. Not so with panties. Every day it is fun to decide on what panties to wear. Is it like that for you?
Online panty shopping is the safest way to go, and Xdress/Body Aware panties are designed with the male physique in mind, in terms of the width of the gusset, which gives a very comfortable fit. It is also fun to go to the “other side of the store” and explore the panty section. I am very fortunate to have a very supportive wife, and we go panty shopping together. I find that shopping in stores appeals to my feminine side, plus it is just a bit risky, making it all the more fun. Part of the fun for me is wearing a very sexy pair of panties under my women’s jeans and nobody has a clue how hot I look under it all. Speaking of jeans, if you try on a pair of women’s skinny jeans, you’ll never go back to men’s jeans. I know, that’s off topic, but I just had to throw that in there.
Okay, so there are my thoughts on the topic. How about you? Are you a full-time panty wearer or limit it to weekends or special occasions? How old were you when you started underdressing? What are your favorite styles/fabrics? What is your preferred style of shopping – online or brick and mortar? Warm up those keyboards guys/gurls. You know I love hearing your stories.
Please dont have all models shaven, some of us are not , we re just men who like lingerie, we dont want to be shaven we wont to be sexy men in lingerie. Some want clean shaven but not all
Welcome to our community Bodhi. A good way to organize and show your market strength would be to contribute regularly to this blog and also to support Xdress who have been working for 3 decades to normalize the concept that it is OK for men to wear lingerie!
Angie, I totally agree with you! I’m a 45 year old man that has worn panties pretty much all my adult life. I enjoy the rebellion of it, the free expression I feel. And I love the fabrics, the lace, the sheer material, the different cuts. There is plenty of sexy underwear made for men, but it still can’t replace the feel of a sexy pair of panties. I wish there were more ways for us panty wearing men to organize so we could show our market strength.
please have all your models be totally clean shaven. Some of your models it looks like they are not completely shaven
I enjoy wearing panties all weekend love the feel of lace on my body is great .enjoy with nice bra. Enjoy a nice dress with a nice pair of heels
Hello all, I’ve been reading the comments and I got very inspired by everything you were saying.
I will never forget the feeling when I got in a shop to buy my first knickers… it was so liberating. After that (around 3 years ago) I started researching online and found out about xdress. Since the beginning I shared about this experience with my girlfriend and at first she got confused. She asked, but you also want to be a woman? She became very supportive about that and today we choose what will be the next knickers together.
I wear them when I am in the mood. Sometimes just to sleep sometimes to spend the day, go out, etc. As long as I don’t feel super self conscious about showing off my thong by accident I am fine. It makes me feel super sexy and comfortable.
But there is one reason I still having boring ‘male’ underwear. Is that you need to be able to afford a collection of good panties… and the true is that it is expensive. I am not talking about the quality that is amazing. But would be fantastic to see this kind of underwear becoming more popular and accessible for everyone!
Lots of love, from Glasgow.
The wonderful world of panties … oh and how wonderful it is. From buying, to wearing, to showing, to colors, to styles, to fabrics … it is truly a wonderful world.
You are so right. For guys raised to be masculine yet desperate to release their feminine side, feminization trainers or support is definitely the way to go. You can however take small steps yourself by practicing your own deportment a little every day; the way you sit with your legs together or lift your posture a little more when you walk for example. Sit up straight. Swing your arms a little less when you walk. Relax your face and open your eyes a little more. All these things are gentler ways of moving through the world and showing respect for yourself and others. Far easier by far if you’re wearing beautiful xdress panties and a bralette too. Shed that aggressive masculine mask and be gentler with the world.
You are absolutely right, having someone there to support you is absolutely essential. It can be a significant other, friend, family member, counselor… anyone that will support you. Sharing your feelings about this side of yourself with someone who won’t judge you completely changes your mindset about it. You will no longer feel ashamed but instead feel encouraged to be yourself, which we all deserve to be.
Nathan: good advice. I am currently building up a panty and bra collection so that I can put away my male underwear and try to wear only panties. I’ll see how long I can do it without reverting back to male underwear. You are absolutely right about comfort and I think that’s one of the many reasons I abandon panties frequently; it’s so hard to find a comfortable fit. Xdress is really helping here but it’s good to have variety, there are so many sexy choices for women. I think what the world needs is feminization trainers (you know, like the gym fitness trainers?). These would be people who would coach you, support your choices and guide you in the right direction until you have permanently removed the toxic programming and are completely comfortable with expressing femininity.
Hi guys gurlz and all in between
What a great discussion! Obviously PANTIES are a HUGE factor in our expression our eroticism our sexuality our feminism or feminine expression.
I love panties on me and women too for that matter
I love even more the matching sets . Its so cool for me to wear male lingerie, so now am I really crossdressing? Well that doesn’t matter because I love pushing the envelope between male and female. Hey i love the styles the clothes the gender mixing
So i push forward
Wear something pretty today
Right on Ally! Yeah, if guys wore pretty underwear they would be more in touch with their feminine side and that would cure the “toxic masculinity” endemic. I certainly feel happier, gentler and generally a nicer person when I am aware I am wearing nice panties. I remember hearing about a jail where the inmates were made to wear pink underwear, I wonder how that worked out.
Such pantyness out there!
It’s so refreshing to read about the feminine things we love to wear in a world that seems to be bursting at the seams with toxic masculinity.
In the same way that there was a ‘burn your bra’ movement in the sixties, perhaps we could start a ‘wear your bra’ movement for guys promoting a gentler and prettier way of living. That would be so liberating!
I’m in blue lace today for the occasion.
So great to read all your comments, advice and suggestions! It’s encouraging to all, especially those who are somewhat new to the community. Like Nathan, panties are my default choice most days and I reserve bralettes for special occasions. It’s a liberating thing to express oneself by expressing one’s inner femme and to be able to share the experiences, including the trial and error parts, is just so refreshing and encouraging. Kudos to everyone for sharing your stories and being open about your femininity!!
I agree with Nathan, Lets keep this blog going and have everyone contribute their thoughts.
For me, I like panties for many reasons, but mainly if I compare the standard men’s clunky boxer briefs inevitable in thick cotton with a pair of delicate panties, in lightweight fabrics and laces in pretty colors and feminine trims and bows, the choice is easy. In fact I don’t understand how any guy, given the choice would want to wear heavy weight constricting boxer briefs, even if they are now available in a few colors and prints. Maybe we who enjoy panties are more aware of our bodies and how we look, compared to the average guy who thinks of underwear as purely functional. I like Xdress panties as they do fit me perfectly, with room up front, as although VS make some nice things, they do cut across my balls (ouch!). In any case the XD selection is great and probably bigger than VS and other women’s brands, and I think its important to support these folks who are pushing the envelope and helping to get it acceptable for men to wear lingerie. So keep it up XD!!
Hello all! This a great conversation and I want to keep it going by offering my thoughts on some of your latest responses.
To G: I hope your dinner outing was enjoyable and that your anxiety wasn’t too bad. I certainly understand how nerve-wracking it can be your first few times wearing a bra publicly. However, you will soon realize that your nervousness is silly, as not many people out there scrutinize your clothing enough to notice you are wearing a bra (unless it has cups or straps are showing, of course).
To John: By simply just making panties your default choice for underwear will remove that toxic mindset that it’s wrong, allowing your inner-femininity to flourish. However, it’s all about comfort. Don’t ever force yourself to wear panties if you know you will not be comfortable. Bras are more occasion based, as most of us want to make sure they aren’t noticeable. As Keri mentioned, bralettes are typically the most ideal for this as they typically have less excess fabric that can poke through outerwear.
To Keri: Bralettes are amazing! I prefer them over bras for the same reasons you mentioned. Their lack of a cup allows the fit to typically be perfect, and there are so many styles! Not to mention they are typically less expensive than bras, which is also a great benefit.
As a side note: today I chose merlot pantyhose, black dress, black heels, and dark red lipstick. It goes together beautifully! Remember to be true to yourselves, and wear something gorgeous!
Thank you Keri for all the tips and tricks. Now I just have to work up the gumption to go into the women’s section in Kohls. I’m definitely going through a feeling out period right now and appreciate all the support and advice. Hope all is well with all of you.
Good questions. I had been thinking that Angie should do a blog on bras.
I have some suggestions and tips if you will regarding buying and wearing bras. The big issue, for me at least, is not wanting them to show through my shirt. Years ago I was outed wearing a bra when I bent forward to do something and a co worker actually asked if I was wearing a bra. It seems the strap at the point of connection showed through. Oops. So there is a risk.
First thought is figuring out your size. A simple tape measure around the body and over your nipples will give you the numerical bra size. Cup size is another story. Most men would be an A or B and even that isn’t completely accurate. Trouble is large bra dimensions do not typically come in an A cup. The second step is to try them on. Every bra fits differently and runs differently. Trying on can be a challenge. Take a deep breath and go to Kohls or Wal Mart. They have a good selection and the fitting rooms are easily accessible. Wal Mart is unisex dressing rooms and Kohls is separated. Years ago I found a few bras in the mens fitting room and realized we are not the only ones and someone had the extra nerve to bring in bras. I generally carry a shirt or some item of mens clothing, cover the bras and just walk in. Leave the bras behind if you don’t purchase if you want. Another idea is to get fitted. I have been told some guys have done this. I never have had the nerve. My sister in law worked in a woman’s store and now and then men came in and asked or called the store. The store she worked in did offer fittings and measurements. The girls in her store actually got a kick out of it. Although I am sure some stores wouldn’t be friendly about the idea. Ask first.
More recently I have personally found that bralettes are not only cute but quite practical for men. You can buy the styles that slip over your head or hook in the back. I definitely prefer the back hook as it feel much more feminine when you are hooking your bra, Plus if we are going to wear them then we need to learn and get used to hooking a bra in the back. By the way, many women actually bring the hooks around to their front, hook their bra and then just pull the bra around. Much easier if you just can not get your arms to hook in the back. The bralettes I look at and like have no cup per se. The lack of a distinct cup or the extra material solves the problem of the bra showing though from the front. Bralettes are fun, lacey, colorful and certainly very feminine. Perfect for us gurls. One more thing. Buy the bralettes with separate shoulder straps versus the over and around the neck style. UNLESS, you just must have your bra strap showing. LOL. They are cute and fun but will likely out you quickly.
These blogs are wonderful. They help all of us become more comfortable with our sexuality and feminine feelings. Thank you Angie and XDress for having these. It is a “Wonderful World Of Panties” and Bras.
Looking for advice on bras: where to get them(besides xdress), sizes to look for, and other tips. I see some stuff say add 4” to the band measure for what you need, others don’t. My band measure was 40” with bust of 42”. Any help is much appreciated. Currently too nervous for a personal fitting
Samuel you should definitely learn to put on a bra by hooking it in the back. It’s the ultimate girly thing to do. I find it helps if you pull the straps down towards your butt before bringing them together. In other words try to hook them lower on your back rather than straight across where they normally sit. That way you don’t need as much flexibility in your arms to hook the straps together.
Very interesting comments about being hardwired to think wearing lingerie is wrong. I agree with this and need to find a way to remove the programming. I think maybe just committing to wearing nothing but panties and a bra (when I can get away with it) might result in a behavior change if done for long enough but I don’t know. Fun finding out though.
Hi Stevie and Nathan – thanks for your comments. When I say I mentioned it to her in general terms, I meant that there is such a thing as male lingerie designed just for men. She wasn’t interested in knowing anything any further! She wouldn’t wear lingerie herself, so doesn’t appreciate the feel and sexiness of it. I haven’t given up hope – I’ll just bide my time. Regarding wearing a jacket, it’s just too hot in our small office. On the very odd occasion when I have the office all to myself, then I can wear a bra too.
G – thanks for your thoughts too and sharing your personal experience. I haven’t given up, just waiting patiently!
John – I know what you mean about lace panties – just not comfy. Silkiness/satin wins every time for me – it looks and feels so feminine. Oh, and I’m no good at trying to hook up a bra from behind my back – just can’t get my arms to get in the right position!!
Thank you all for taking the time to reply to my post and giving me advice – I really appreciate it.
Hi again guys and gurls. I’ve so enjoyed reading your posts on this blog. I’ve stayed out of the conversation so others could carry on conversations and share stories and questions. It seems that we cover a broad span of experience, from those just starting to explore underdressing to those who are old hands at it. To the old hands – thank you for the gentle and caring guidance you are offering to those who are new to this wonderful and fascinating experience of exploring the feminine side of who we know ourselves to be. This has been such enjoyable reading, and I hope you all will continue this blog’s conversation. I have no doubt that many of the responses here are helping others who are not so sure about their journey. Above all of the conversation and sharing is an over-arching joy of daring to be different. Thank you all for your sharing! Now, get out there and buy something pretty!
Hey John I m with you
Bra panty match is the bomb
Zack, I like your thoughts on women moving towards plain panties and allowing men to move towards feminine styles. What a wonderful world that would be! And I second your idea of an Xdress shop, I would be the first in line. There is nothing like being able to feel the fabrics which is always missing from the online experience.
Also wanted to mention that I love wearing bras as well. Panties and a bra is such a sexy look together. I don’t usually wear bras out because they are harder to hide unless I’m wearing a thicker shirt but winter is coming so that may very well be an opportunity. I’d like to see XDRESS offer more selection that hooks in the back rather than the type you just pull over your head. The hook style gives that little bit of extra mental tingle that you are doing something feminine. How many guys can say they are proficient at hooking a bra on themselves from the back without looking? Hehehe.