“Don’t get your panties in a knot,” my girlfriend told me when I told her that I was upset with ads I saw while Googling XDress. When I pulled up the Google search, I saw ads for other sites and products. Ads for men’s lingerie, but what got me upset was the reference to queer, and sissy when describing the products. My immediate reaction to this was “wait a minute, I am not either one of those things,” I am not a queer, or a sissy. Again, she gently reminded me about not getting my panties in a knot.
I happen to be a heterosexual male, who just happens to like some of the finer things in life. I enjoy fine wine, I enjoy great coffee, I wear very colorful shirts, and have some really great shoes. I also happen to like and enjoy beautiful lingerie, satin, lace, and very sexy ways of expressing who I am, such as those items that XDress provides. So, because I like and enjoy these things, why on earth would the words queer and sissy be related? My girlfriend can attest that I am not either. This is not to say that one is right or wrong, but why on earth do we place these labels on people?
I wrote a blog a while back called Am I Gay? to share with the readers that just because we like “feminine” things, doesn’t mean that we are, nor should we think we are gay. In fact, I feel more like myself, and am very confident when donning my bra and panties that my girlfriend picks out for me every morning. The furthest thing I feel like, is a sissy. When I lean into my feminine side, I get to embrace all aspects of myself, and my confidence goes up. So, as I have my “feminine” underwear on underneath my “masculine” outerwear, just as I do when I am leading business meetings, my confidence pays off. It is the balance between these two energies is where my power is. It really is the best of both worlds.
Now, is this really worth getting my panties in a knot? Probably not. But the stereotyping of people really gets me going. I know that I am not the only heterosexual male on this site who appreciates some of the finer things in life. I truly enjoy the look and feel of satin and lace, especially the latest luxe collection, particularly in the peach satin. When I initially put that on, my girlfriend very much enjoyed the look and showed this with a “it looks sexy” and a whistle. I really do enjoy looking and feeling sexy for her. It’s not a one-way street.
I, for one, really appreciate the fact that XDress has created high quality and sexy products in many colors and designs for men. Never have I seen them position it as queer, or sissy, or any sort of label. It’s lingerie for men, period. When I order products, I never have to feel any shame, guilt, or whatever thoughts go through people’s minds. I get to pick what I want, hit send, and look forward to looking and feeling sexy in something I love. Plus, it’s not only for my enjoyment.
I would really like to hear from the heterosexual men on this site. How do you feel about this topic? Does stereotyping men’s lingerie with being a sissy or a queer get your panties in a knot? I would love to hear your thoughts, then go untie your panties, and enjoy.
WB
18 comments
I completely agree! I wish it were more normalized about men’s lingerie especially in America. But I’m hoping we’ll see that in my lifetime. It took some time but my wife has accepted it and even compliments me on my under choices :). Just a lot of alpha men out there who want to feel more feminine deep down but ultimately put labels and mock because they are insecure. Nothing more comforting to me than having a long day at work and coming home to my comfy panties and lingerie! Great post my friend
It used to bother me when I first started wearing lingerie. It led to a bit of soul searching and self questioning my sexuality (I am a happily married heterosexual). There was always the nagging voice in my head “you wear women’s underwear, you must be gay”. This was an entirely unnecessary thought process but it did happen because of the association between the two things. Over time, with the support of my wife (who is now at the awesome level of acceptance where she will pick out things when shopping or suggest items to me) I’ve learnt to embrace that side of myself and to be truly comfortable in my own skin (and clothes). It’s definitely an ongoing process and probably one that is never complete, but those tired associations don’t phase me now.
Hate labels. Why does it matter what we wear, especially in 2024! Love the confidence that satin panties bring me under my men’s wear and my SO loves how I look in them! XDress is a great site that opens these conversations to everyone on the site band it hopefully makes acceptance feel better for those on the site. However, society will still carry the stigma and viewpoint. It’s unfortunate but embrace you as an individual and don’t worry what others think or do. Be yourself and as long as you are comfortable, embrace it!