The Beautiful Part of Us

None of us decided to be who we are.  We are who we are and we are perfect the way we are.  This part of us is exactly that...its a part of us.  We will not outgrow this.  This is not something we can, or should stop.  Love this part of you, because it is part of you.  

For most of us, we discovered this part of us at a very early age.  And if you're reading this, its because you have accepted and have embraced this part of you.  I'm proud of you.

I don't think many of us were shopping at the mall recently and thought "you know, instead of boxers, I think I'll try those cute, lacy panties instead".  I am also unsure if there were any of us who decided when shopping for shoes for a job interview that rather those boring wingtip dress shoes, we'd wear five inch stiletto heels instead.  

The point is that we don't just wake up and decide to start wearing dresses instead of jeans as adults.  Our dressing begins, for most of us, begins at a young age.  I've written before that the first memory of my dressing was trying on my mother's heels (link to the previous blog 'Giving Yourself Permission to be Fabulous').  My dressing started then, and it continued all throughout my life.  I knew it wasn't something that boys were allowed to do, I knew it wasn't something boys were supposed to do, but those social and gender expectations never made me stop.  I didn't WANT to stop.  I knew I couldn't.  I knew then that this wasn't a was who I was and today it's who I am.  

In school I watched enviously as the girls played dress-up wearing beautiful clothes that looked a little like the Little Miss Muffet Tea Dress and school uniforms.  I so wanted to wear what the girls wore.  Thanks to Xdress' Back to School Uniform, I can make that dream a reality.   

Whenever I meet another girl like me, it''s not uncommon for us to have a conversation about how....all this started.  We were often fascinated and jealous of the pink dresses that our sisters wore.  We were mesmerized by bras and wondered what it would be like to wear one.  We all remember the first time we felt this pull, we all remember the first time we wanted to wear a dress and the first time we made that dream come true.  We all knew that not every boy felt this way and that it should be a secret.  Some of us were caught by our parents or siblings.  Some of us told our family what we wanted to wear.  

Coming out to others is never easy.  We are putting ourselves in a very vulnerable position where we are revealing what is probably the most intimate and secretive...and beautiful part of us.  For some of us, coming out is not a choice, such as when someone "catches" us, such as when we are young.  I've come out to a few people in my life with varying results.  I can't say that I was ever correct at guessing how they would react.  

So, when did you first start wanting to wear lingerie?  What were your first memories of wanting to wear princess dresses, or high heels or makeup?  What were your experiences growing up and coming out to other people?

Love, Hannah


Hi Mike!
I’ve been to the Gay 90’s. I live in the Minneapolis area and you might want to visit my website and check out my group ‘The MN T-Girls’.

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 21, 2018

Hi Sidney! Your drawer sounds a lot like mine!

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 21, 2018

Hi Don! I am so glad you found someone to share your passions with!

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 21, 2018

Hi Madelyn! I am so glad you liked the blog. I appreciate you sharing it!

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 21, 2018

For me it was about 8
Between 8-10 our family added 2 baby girls. Thsts when it started

It started with my moms high heels. I liked thst so much i tried panty hose
Then panties then skirts then dresses

I stopped in college except when i came home

I now know it made me closer to my mom as i felt the babies were getting all her attention. She made over them so much i was jealous

It came back in my late 20s and I explored all options finally after purges and swearing i d stop to realizing at 50 that i m a crossdressing heyero male with no need or desires to change sex-i love being male but i love wearing lingerie high strappy heels and painting my toes

I ve accepted who i am
My gender is predominantly male with a fluidity to occasionally present feminine though not female

I live who i am i love feeling sexy and pretty and the clothes just make me feel so good

I m not out to anyone except my wife

Stevie June 21, 2018


Have recently completed my story- Hopefully it will be posted soon by TASI on “Entry Hall SISTER HOUSE” under the title “TALL GAL PERSONA”. You and some of your readers might enjoy it. Marie Anne

Marie Anne Greene June 21, 2018

I remember when I tried on my moms clothes and how good they felt, I was in jr high. After that I would sneak into her room and wear her clothes as often as I could. Then when I was married I would go into the bedroom when no one was home and put on my wife’s under garments and clothes. I’ve been divorced for about 10 years now and I dress like this at home. I’ve got a whole closet full of women’s dresses, night gowns, pant suits, tops, and slacks. I’ve got bras and panties which I love wearing under my (ugh) men’s clothes. I’ve even thought about wanting to transition. I so want to go out into the world dressed as a woman, but I never have. I’ve gone to 1 club called the gay ninties in mpls dresses as a woman, and felt very comfortable there

Mike June 21, 2018

I hope you liked my blog! I can’t remember not wanting to wear dresses, heels and makeup. I stated underdressing on a regular basis when I was in my teens. I still remember how amazing it felt to wear a bra, panties, a garter belt and black stockings under my male clothes. I never went back after that…

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 21, 2018

Thank you for telling your story i stared with sister pantyhose .have. Dresser full of panty bra thigh high heel outer wear .Don’t want to stop thank you for your blog

Sidney June 21, 2018

I agree with all what you have said above. I knew when I first looked at my mothers underwear drawer (at a young age) I liked what I saw. Putting all that aside-time went on. I love to have sex with females, but I also had my first experience with another guy at age 12. I loved many women throughout the years, and a few guys, but still hiding my inner feelings. Finally, I found my partner and wow she is the best ever. She encourages me to be myself and asks me to go put something sexy on. What a find a lovely lady that enjoys what I`m interested in. So now we were each others underwear and have great sex with toys and movies. She likes when I get all dressed up and let her penetrate my with her strap on. Now we are in search of same like minded couples so we can grow as individuals and as a sweet couple. Bottom line no one can tell you how you feel :)

Don June 21, 2018

This is one very Beautiful Blog which mirrors how I & many others like me confessed to ourselves who we really are. I will be sharing this Blog with the most beautiful, sincere, & feminine friends I have met & who I chat with on line.
Once again thank you for such a true & beautiful post. It made me feel so good as to who I am & expressed my true desires.


Madelyn June 21, 2018

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