Giving Yourself Permission To Be Fabulous!

I was young, like most of us probably were. I didn't think there was anything wrong with wanting to wear what I wanted to wear, but I somehow knew it had to be a secret.  I was around five years old when I finally did it.  I opened the closet and I took my mom's high heels and brought them into another room to try them.  Of course, I was in love with how they looked on me.  I couldn't wait to grow up and have a pair of heels for myself.

The excitement was quickly overtaken by... fear?  The fear of being caught, I imagine.  No, what took over was guilt.  I grew up being told that boys wore certain clothes and shoes and did not wear pretty dresses and makeup.  I knew that, but I didn't know why not.  I couldn't understand why everybody didn't want to wear pretty dresses.  Weren't skirts and heels more fun?

These days I have more heels and dresses than I ever could have imagined.  The latest addition to my lingerie drawer is Xdress' Glistening Satin Camisole (in pink of course) and the Little Miss Muffet Tea Dress hangs in my closet begging to be worn.  I think I need to match that cute little dress with a pair of white Mary Jane Platform heels.  What do you think?

Having a lot of beautiful panties to chose from didn't happen overnight.  It takes time to fill a lingerie drawer... but is there anything more fun than building your lingerie wardrobe?  Picking out high heels and cute dresses takes more than just doing some shopping.  You need to give yourself permission to be fabulous and to give yourself permission to wear whatever you want to wear.

We've all wondered why we do this.  What does this mean?  Why do we want to wear bras (with matching panties, garter belts and black seamed stockings, of course)?  We see beautiful dresses at the mall and there's this.. longing in our hearts to wear it.  We love the sound of high heels clicking on the floor and we imagine how amazing it would be to walk confidently in the office wearing a pair of black patent stilettos, too.

Are we gay?  Is that what this means?  No.  Wanting to wake up in a cute little nightgown does not mean you are gay.  It's a normal thing to think, and it's usually the first thing we are asked when we tell someone that we love wearing what we love to wear.  There's no connection between sexuality and clothing.  Some of us have a hard time allowing ourselves to wear that satin camisole under our business suit because, well, men don't wear lingerie.  Men aren't supposed to wear panties (with ribbons and bows, naturally).  Many of us have this...fear, this guilt, perhaps even shame of wanting to wear what we want to wear.

I'm sure you know this, but it never hurts to be reminded of this:  There's nothing wrong with wanting to wear lingerie, beautiful dresses, towering high heels, winged eyeliner or whatever you want to wear.  It also doesn't mean anything.  It doesn't change your sexuality, it doesn't mean you were born with the wrong body, it doesn't mean that you are meant to transition.  The only thing it means is that you love wearing lingerie.  Whether it makes you feel sexy, beautiful, relaxed or confident, you don't need a reason to wear panties.  Or a bra.  Or a miniskirt. 

Once I fully embraced who I was, that's when my closet started to fill with dresses and my panty drawer and my stocking drawer started to overflow.  I look at my wardrobe and I remember it took more than shopping to have such an amazing closet.

It took giving myself permission to be who I am... to be FABULOUS.
So, buy that corset you've been dreaming about!  Fall asleep in that nightie like you've always wanted!  Wear a matching cami and panty set under your boring business suit! 

Lingerie is a gift you give yourself... and so is loving yourself.

Love, Hannah


You should always give yourself permission to be fabulous! Being fabulous is different everybody. I do think the clothes we wear help with our self esteem and confidence which leads to our fabulous selves so wear what you want, when you want and how you want!

Scott October 02, 2020

Dilipating all body hair from every wear.

Holly January 09, 2019

that is the most fun in the world to build an xdress wardrobe. Starting with panties then baby dolls and learning how to apply makeup such as eyebrow makeup.Facial and body creams ,etc

Holly January 09, 2019

Hi Charlie! Building your lingerie wardrobe is one of the most fun things you can do. What’s next on your wish list?

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 29, 2018

Hey Hannah,

I picked out some satin corkscrew panties, a Greek god panty, and the butterfly panty. They didn’t disappoint. I look forward to building my lingerie wardrobe. Thanks for asking Hannah!


Charlie June 26, 2018

Hi Charlie! I’m so happy to hear that! What pretty panties did you pick out?

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 19, 2018


Thank you! Your right…no turning back!

Charlie June 17, 2018

I definitely did…will be ordering more panties and bras. Hannah thanks to you for a blog that does a great job articuting how I feel about wearing feminine stuff. What you outlined did a great job of saying what I feel about wearing feminine things. Thank you!

Charlie June 17, 2018

I’m all lingerie, I luv all of it, if it fits I’ll try it on. I own many pieces, bought, borrowed and found (taken) and it makes me feel good. I’m 59, hairy and lingerie turns me on, wife knows, she accepts but doesn’t really approve, but that ain’t stopping me.

Dean June 12, 2018

Hi Steff! I agree! And there’s nothing wrong with that!

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 12, 2018

Hannah so tru
A silky nightgown just feels good and whats wrong with that ?

Steff June 11, 2018

Thank you! I love the photo as well. ;) Coming out to anyone, especially your significant other, puts one in a very vulnerable position. When one opens up to someone, it’s a sign of trust. You are willing to reveal something about yourself to someone without knowing how they will react. Trust, in its many forms, can create a stronger bond between two people.

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 11, 2018

“There’s no connection between sexuality and clothing”. So true Hannah. What I wear or how I wear it does not reflect my sexuality. As a panty wearing male my wife finds me more attractive and intune with my self, my fem side, and even her – which makes for a much stronger and happy marriage. Whether you just wear lingerie or out wear or anything you have to be true to the self before you can share the self with others. By the way Hannah, love the new photo.

OPW June 08, 2018

Hi Angie! Thank you! Too many people associate behavior, gender norms and sexuality with clothes. Nothing feels better than waking up in a nightgown or slipping on a pair of panties or the silkiness of a stocking on a smooth leg.

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 07, 2018

Hi Sidney! What is it about wearing a red dress that makes us feel so irresistible?

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 07, 2018

Hi Steffi! So glad to hear you have embraced yourself and how the love of lingerie is universal no matter how you identify.

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 07, 2018

I let myself feel guilty and ashamed of my love of feminine clothes for forty years. No more. As of last fall, I have been going out in pretty outfits that are appropriate to the seaso. I don’t need anyone’s permission or approval. If you don’t think I look nice in a yellow silk tea dress over a lace camisole while I am out shopping, then tough nuts to you. Say it loud, I’m skirted and I’m proud!

Andy June 07, 2018

Very nice blog, Hanna. We are so on the same page. As you said, wanting to wear pretty, lacy things with bows is not about sexuality. It’s about who we are inside, and yes, it is fabulous! My wife likes to wear jeans, flannel shirts, and loves power tools. Does that make her gay? Absolutely not, and she can do the girly girl thing really well. Like you and me, she is gender fluid and loves it. Binary gender is so not a part of our home, and we love it! Thank you for your thoughtful blog which, I’m sure, speaks to the majority of our community.

Charlie, I’m excited for you in this, your first order of panties and cami. Once you put them on, there’s no turning back! Keri, as always, great reply. Don’t you just love a smooth, satiny nightie?


Angie June 06, 2018

There is nothing like weaing a great pair of panties and a sexy bra with my Brest form under my red dress with thigh high with 4 in shoes. Fill free to be your shelf wear what makes you happy

sidney June 06, 2018

Hi Keri!
Yes, this is not a phase you outgrow. Embrace and love who you are.

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 06, 2018

Thank you Sara!

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 06, 2018

Hi Charlie! I hope you had fun picking out your first set of panties!

Love, Hannah

Hannah McKnight June 06, 2018

I gave myself permission after accepting myself as a heterosexual male who loves feeling sexy in lingerie!
Gender fluid maybe but never wanting to be a woman
So once I figured myself out I accepted it and went with it
I m a full time underdresser, wearing bras in the winter and camis now in the spring
Panties everyday
I cant live seeing my toes not painted
All that doesn’t have anything to do with my sexuality
I love women and everything about them
I m open enough to celebrate all the differences in the world
We re all different
Be accepting and open and love yourself and life

Steff June 06, 2018

OMG Hannah. You are so right. Speaking as someone that has passed the “young” stage I can say you must give yourself permission. Stop fighting it. Does it really matter what society thinks or has conditioned us to believe? I say NO. I remember when women burned their bras in front of City Hall or some other public place. They did not want to be restricted by societal rules. In those days girdles went by the side and so did, in part, hose and garter belts as well as pantyhose to some degree. Maybe it is time for men to show up wearing panties, bras and stockings with garter belts en masse. Something needs to trigger a larger movement towards men having more and frankly much better options.

Unless you are already part of this community most or many guys have no idea how comfy a pair of panties can be. How wonderful it is to wake un in a pretty nightie. How fabulous slipping on a pair of panties and hooking up a bra can feel. I can honestly say I have given myself a lot of permission and I love feeling feminine.

Keri June 05, 2018

A beautiful read! Thank you!

Sara Meez June 05, 2018

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