Who Told Us How to Dress?

Who Told Us How to Dress?

I’m really excited to be invited to write a guest blog post here; everything about Xdress, this brand, this lingerie, makes me happy. The stylish, bold photographs, the stunning designs, the beauty. And it also feels a little “naughty”, a little taboo, a little or a lot different. Yes, even in 2022.

And why should that be? Who created the “norms” of who should wear what? Is what is considered “acceptable” today different from the past? And if we desire something different, how does that get created?

A brief google search reveals what I intuitively knew: the gender distinctions of who wears what are comparatively new, as are ideas such as blue for a boy and pink for a girl. In the past, men have sported skirts, dresses, togas, as well as high heels and make-up.

And then it all changed. It was in the Victorian era that the delineation of clothing by gender became more defined. It went so far that some US cities even made cross dressing illegal, in the nineteenth and early twentieth century.

Thankfully, this seems almost inconceivable now, and we have a new phenomenon where many people desire to free themselves from gender roles, and gender delineations, and this is reflected in the fashion scene where there is a trend towards gender-neutral.

Men's pink ribbed cami and pantyXDress' Eco Ribbed Cami & Panties

There is another interesting dynamic here. It seems that women choosing to wear men’s clothing has always been more socially acceptable than vice versa. Throughout history, there are instances of women dressing as men in order to have the societal freedoms that are afforded to men. Generally, men are “higher” in the social hierarchy, so women choosing to dress as men is somehow seen as an advancement or a betterment. When men dress as women, this can appear the opposite, and cause suspicion and confusion. And of course prejudice.

Beyond this, a woman wearing her husband’s shirt can be sexy. Actually, this reminds me of borrowing my Dad’s shirts when I was a teenager, and this was in fashion – and definitely sexy. There can sometimes be a sense when a man wears a dress it’s something a bit ridiculous, and far from sexy.

Of course, this is not so with Xdress underwear. The way this underwear is presented, the way the men are being as they pose is bold, different, daring, unconventional, unapologetically sexy and actually in a way exciting. These pictures, this “advertising” is so challenging to the “norm” even nowadays that there are several social media platforms that push back against allowing Xdress to advertise.

When something is so different that it is banned, this often comes with a fight against the mainstream,  a resistance and reaction to the norms – a bit like a teenage rebellion, or a “F-you” to the establishment - we will have our lacy underwear, we will be different, and you can keep your normal ways of dressing and behaving and die of boredom!

This violence, this force, and antagonism in the expression of the difference can create reaction and violence from the other side, which leads to repression – which of course we are so familiar with.

When I look at the models in XDress photographs, what shines out for me is the models’ enjoyment of the lace, the thong, the tight fit, the bra,………………My sense is they know they look good, and they enjoy that too – and not from a sense of “superiority”, just from a feeling of confidence that their choice in underwear gives them. They know what works, they know who they are, and they actually don’t care what other people think, positive or negative.

And when I say they don’t “care”, this is from the space of so enjoying what they are choosing and being true to themselves that not only are other people’s opinions irrelevant, they don’t have the need to even wonder what they are.

 

Men's purple lace panties and braXDress' Purple Valentina Panties & Bra


The underwear is an invitation just to enjoy life. So, wearing clothes to decorate the body while making the body feel happy and alive, does not have to be the sole domain of women. XDress’ gorgeous, sensual fabrics, unique colors, and unusual designs are an invitation to opulence, luxury, hedonism, and enjoyment.

And my point of view - as with everything in life, what’s the point if it’s not fun? What’s the point if it doesn’t feel good? This underwear is an invitation to truly enjoying the feel of the fabric, the luxury of satin on your skin, the decoration of lace. It is somehow saying our bodies are important, enjoyment and hedonism are valuable, our bodies deserve to be given sexy, attractive clothing, whether we are male or female, gay or straight, and whatever the prevailing ideas about clothing are.

And my sense is that through this bold, unapologetic choice to be different with underwear and clothing, with luxury and enjoyment, acceptance will follow. Other people who may secretly desire something different in their clothing will feel enabled and gain the courage to go for it. Even if things don’t change as quickly as we might wish, at least in the meantime, those people who desire something different can have it, even if they are not allowed to share it on social media! 

 

Fiona, Guest Blogger

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33 comments

I have felt compelled to wear women’s underwear for as long as I can remember. I’ve never understood why and regularly tried to resist or deny my desire and urges at various times over the years. I love wearing feminine lingerie and kept this as my secret for over 40 years, including throughout my first marriage of 15 years. About 5 years ago I met an amazingly wonderful and open minded partner, who is now my wife. After we met I gradually hinted to her about my secret love of lingerie and she gradually encouraged me to dress up for her, initially trying panties and slowly progressing to other items of lingerie. I now love nothing more than dressing up for her in panties, stockings, suspenders, basques/corsets and high heels, and she loves it too (and finds it a massive turn on!). I’ve stopped trying to understand or explain my lingerie desires and now just enjoy my little ‘quirk’ wholeheartedly (and being able to share this all with an amazing woman just makes everything that much more exciting and enjoyable). I now have a large selection of lingerie from several women’s underwear stores but none can match my xdress collection for the fit, comfort and absolute sexiness!

John

Thank you Fiona for the blog. My choice is to dress all under in erotic wear, be it more traditional men’s underwear or Xdresses made for men panties, bras, garter belts, nylons, etc. Had tried women’s underwear, bras, etc in the past but did not like the “feel” but have become a huge Xdress fan. Whether a masculine male in lingerie or a crossdresser getting in touch with their feminine side lingerie is for men also.

Mike

Gender fluidity is celebrated and often revered in many cultures including Polynesian and indigenous Australian and American nations. The conservative religious outfits have made a decision that their interpretation of gender is correct and this then makes it more difficult for penis and vagina owners to dress as they feel most comfortable. Its comforting to know Xdress is there with stunning lingerie for undercover comfort for many. Its a real shame so many have a fixed and very incorrect idea of freedoms that will use emotional blackmail to stop their partners from enjoying clothing choices that makes them feel good.

Steve

Thanks for the support Steve. Thank you for your support dear friends. It is so inspiring that you are not alone, that there are friends who will support, help with good advice, find the most beautiful and magical underwear, which is designed for a handsome, courageous and feminine man. Let’s go forward!!!

Andi

Fantastic commentary, we have to push forward to b ourselves! It feels so good when I do. I encourage you to do the same!
It took me a long time to own my love of lingerie and still maintain my masculinity! So if ur not trans (trans is ok too) its ok to be masculine and adorn yourself with beautiful lingerie and enjoy the feel of the fabrics!

Be beautiful my friends and get your lingerie on

Stevie

Stevie

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