Support Groups for Crossdressers

Support Groups for Crossdressers

While perusing the magazine section the other day, I came across an article in OUT magazine called “When Your Wife’s Bra Wont Fit You” by Chadwick Moore which talked about the underground world of support groups for gender diverse people and their families.  Specifically, the article featured the New York-based group Crossdressers International (CDI) - a members only support group that works in tandem with Miss Vera’s Finishing School for Boys Who Want to Be Girls.  Ironically, the academy is run by a woman named Veronica Vera who operates the school out of her Chelsea apartment.  


Part of Miss Vera’s mission is to “help wives understand and embrace their husbands’ cross-dressing desires.” The academy also offers a locker room so that closeted crossdressers and people in transition can come together to get dolled up, get make-up and wig lessons, practice walking in heels, or just relax in peace.  Anonymity is crucial so real names are never used.  Essentially, it is a day spa for crossdressers.  

Similar organizations include:

  • CHIC (Crossdressrs Heterosexual Intersocial Club)

  • Over the Rainbow Transformations in Portland, OR

  • Carla’s Boutique in San Jose, CA

  • Tris Ess Crossdressers

I am definitely a fan of these organizations because, let’s face it, it’s hard out there for a crossdresser, especially heterosexual crossdressers who can’t seem to find a place in this ever evolving world that has to put a label on everything and everyone.  

Let us know in the comment box below if you are a member of any support groups or crossdressing organizations.  Are they useful?  Do you know of any other groups?  Would you join one?

Until you have found your support system, Xdress is proud to be your outlet.  You can always rely on us for cross dressing topics, trends, and of course, amazing panties!  So, put on some heels, let your hair down and fix yourself a cocktail.  It’s happy hour somewhere!

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Would love to meet other lingerie wearers in Seattle area. If you know of a support group that meets in area please leave a note as to name of group. Thanks for any info that you might have.

Seattle Bill

I’ve known since I was 13 that I wanted to wear girls panties and maybe more. I’ve always wondered if I was gay in some way, or weird or I don’t know what. The first few times I tried on panties, they were my stepsister’s. The feeling was electric and I knew I wanted more. But at the same time I was wrestling with what this meant. I decided that it was wrong, at least the part of sneaking into my sister’s room to grab her panties, and after doing so a few times, I decided to stop. Later in my life, I dated a woman who wanted me to wear her panties. I balked at first because I had to be the macho guy but I was screaming in my head “Yes!!!!”. That relationship lasted only a few years and I was back to the desire to wear women’s clothes and the idea that it was somehow wrong. Occasionally I would break down and go to the store and buy a pair of panties and a bra. I’d wear them for 1-4 hours before taking them off. I’d keep them for a couple of weeks then toss them out again because it still felt wrong and I didn’t want to get caught. This went on for several years until my girlfriend and I moved in together. I remember thinking that I’d never be able to wear panties or bras again, and while this realization sucked, I accepted it. I never put on her stuff because I felt it would be a violation of her trust and privacy. Later on we got married. Sometimes I would dream at night about wearing women’s clothes and I’d wake up longing to wear them again. But a few weeks ago my wife and I were talking about sex and I just blurted out that I wanted to buy panties for me to wear. She either didn’t hear me or she didn’t know what to say so she ignored me. A week or two later I found an opening in our conversation to bring it up again. This time she listened and asked questions. Her biggest concern was that there was something else I wanted to tell her like “Oh by the way, I’m gay and want a divorce.” But there wasn’t anything else to add accept that I wanted her. No one else. A few nights later when I was at work she texted me that she had a surprise for me under my pillow. I had a few ideas what could be under there, including divorce paperwork. But to my astonishment, I found four sexy pairs of panties and a red nightie with a matching G-string. Since then she has taken me shopping and bought me two more nighties, stockings, a garter belt and several pairs of panties, a nightgown and a camisole with matching shorts. Last week she came home from a week visiting family in another state with a beautiful pink baby doll nightie. As I write this, I haven’t worn my “guy’s” underwear for three weeks and I’m wearing a gorgeous white nightie with the matching G-string. My wife is very supportive and I’m very lucky to have her. I don’t know if I’ll take my cross dressing any further because I still enjoy being a man with hairy arms, and legs (although I’ve started shaving my legs at her request) and having a deep voice. For now, I find this very sexy and comforting and have no plans to ever stop it again.

Jill Quinn

Hello I am Rachel I am 64years old I have been wearing the clothes of my true sex which is female since I was 16 I hate boys clothes they are so uncomfortable all my girlfriends new I wore knickers and tights and did not have much of a problem with them really my wife of 40years bought me knickers and tights she liked me to wear when we were courting i use to dress up at home when we got married but when children arrived that had to stop but I had a very strong urge to dress as a woman and could not stop because I knew deep down in my heart and mind I was a woman so 35 years ago I introduced Rachel to the outside world I drove out of town so I did not meet anybody I knew I was very nervous and my appearance ie make up etc was not great but the next time I was a little more confident and with practice my make up was getting better every time till it was as nice as any other lady It is important that you are confident in yourself and look forward do not look down that’s a total give away to the public make sure what you wear matches and not clashes and do not wear high heels unless you have practiced at home as there is an art to walking in heels any woman will tell you they are not comfortable to use to walk for long periods I always walk in flats or kitten heels till I get to were ever I am going to let say a restaurant and then slip on my heels also my advice is do not drive in heels also a lady’s feel on top of the world after they have been to the hair salon so make sure your hair (wig) suits your appearance and look after it as hair to a woman is so important so make sure you get it right as it does not matter if you go to a lot of trouble getting a lovely outfit and pretty shoes beautiful tights + jewellery etc if the hair style is wrong or the wind has messed it up make sure you check it out and have brush or comb in your handbag to put matters right obviously you should also carry a mirror in your bag but it a lot easier to use the mirror in the lady’s wash room that’s another hurdle you must get over when you can pass as a woman outside you should have the confidence to use the lady’s room to me it’s normal to use the lady’s room all my life I have had a problem using public toilets as It felt wrong having to use the gent’s one day a lady friend accompanied on a day trip I need the lady’s my friend waited outside I went in but as I came out of the cubical there was a male cleaner in the lady’s wash room I was in a right state when I rejoined my friend waiting outside what’s is wrong with you love I told hear she burst out laughing because a man was in the lady’s but she understood how I was feeling I feel sorry for any girls who are not confident enough to go out dressed and have to stay at home as you are missing out on so much fun it’s lovely to hear an assistant say hello madam good bye dear excuse me while I serve this lady or go into a restaurant or a bar that I use regularly and they address you as hello miss or hello Rachel how are you I have never had anybody work out that I am a woman who was given the wrong plumbing between my legs and been nasty to be truthful if any one has spoken to me its nice things and how pleased a have not hidden my true self away.and I am able to be the woman I know I have always been my only regret that I could not afford to get my plumbing altered years ago but I have known from about age 12 that I was mentally a female in the wrong body I wish I could meet people in the England Wales Scotland who would like to take there feminine side outside but need someone to support them


I 💖 wearing panties & stockings around my apartment & when I go out have fantasy of finding others like myself & playing dress up & maybe more.. Is that normal.?


I trued it a couple of times when wife is not home love it looking for groups in mass or a personal teacher


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