Hello Hannah! I've been wearing longer acrylic nails and facial makeup for a few years now. I am a straight guy, but I think everyone thinks that I am not. I don’t think I act like I am gay or trans or anything else. Why the double standard when it comes to male vs female outward appearance? Example, women wearing tattoos don't normally challenge their sexual identity. Thoughts? Thanks. GWB
You can't stop someone from thinking what they are thinking.
I mean, it's their right to think whatever they wish.
But what they think doesn't have to impact you. Besides, how would you even know what someone else is thinking? I mean, unless you walk up to them and ask them what they think of you, you probably won't know. And please, don't do that. That's weird.
And really, if someone thinks that you are gay or transgender, who cares? Does it really matter what some random person at the mall thinks about you? You will likely never see them again.
Also, I am not sure what you mean by acting like you are gay or transgender. Sexual orientation and gender identity do not mean you exhibit specific characteristics.
To your point, the world has always, and probably will continue to treat people differently based on their gender presentation and what someone wears. Is it fair? Of course not.
We have been conditioned to view gender as binary and we have been conditioned to stereotype and classify EVERYTHING when it comes to gender. Whether it is a piece of clothing, a color, a career, a feeling, EVERYTHING Is for a BOY or a GIRL. Since EVERYTHING is for a boy OR a girl, people will assume that when a boy does something that girls do, then that boy's gender identity or sexuality is put under scrutiny.
Is it fair that a guy can't paint his nails? Is it fair that a boy can't wear pink? Is it fair that a boy can't wear eyeliner? My perspective is that a guy CAN do these things. Sure, some people won't care for it, but that's their problem. Besides, there's not a single thing that everyone in the world likes and approves of and is in agreement on. Afterall, there are some people who still think the earth is flat. Crossdressing (specifically, you wearing acrylic nails and makeup) will NEVER be "okay". We as humans will never collectively do away with gender roles and gender presentation.
When we have new experiences, we can begin to empathize with others who have the same experiences as part of their normal, everyday life.. This is the very definition of walking a mile in someone else's shoes. Soooo..... when those shoes are black patent leather stilettos, we can start to understand what many women experience, and what they may have likely experienced. Let's look at a small list of what women in the United States have experienced when it comes to equality. Is it fair that women were not allowed to vote until 1920? Is it fair that women were not allowed to get a credit card in their name until 1974? Is it fair that statistically women earn less than men for the same job?
Yes, this is a little extreme but the point is that equality does not come easily, quickly, or without a fight. It takes time and It takes effort. It takes the rest of the world to stop being complicit with "how things have always been". Eventually, though it may take a million years, we will stop thinking that eyeshadow is only for girls. Until then, stop speculating what others MIGHT be thinking. It's only holding you back. After all, there may be guys who see your makeup and are jealous of your confidence and makeup skills.
In order for things that have been done in a certain way to change, then that change must be fought for. Women were not given the right to vote, they fought for it. If men want to wear makeup without being judged, then makeup wearing men must put in the work. In this case, that work requires visibility and representation to the point where a dude wearing lipstick becomes a more frequent sight. Once people become used to seeing a guy wearing lipstick, then it stops being a big deal.
Love, Hannah
3 comments
Thank you you have made me feel better and i am ready to start my new adventure with make up i am a male and wanted to do it for so long now having read this i am ready.l just now need to sort out what to use and how to use it but hay I will be able to figure that out the main thing is I am going to do it thanks to yourself. Best wishes. Melvin
Yes this is hard
I love getting a pedicure
I love polish on my toes
I cover it up
:(
I m not out like that
Occasionally i ll wear foundation mascara and lip gloss but only when i go out of towm
:(
Well u have to read the room and judge whether or not u can handle the scrutiny
I can not
So i live my femme side in the shadows
But for me it works
U dont have to out yourself
Sometimes yhe secret life is enough
Gender is a social construct and its for a reason and its not all bad
Be you dress on my lovelies
Stevie
Good answer!