Pillow Talk w/ Hannah: Cat Eye & Shadow Woes!

Learning makeup is done by doing.  Practice makes progress.  

There's several things that go into eyeliner and eyeshadow.  One aspect is having a steady hand.  Applying eyeliner while your hand and finger shakes isn't going to create the straight, consistent line that eyeliner needs.  A shaky hand is often the result of doing something you're not used to (such as makeup) but perhaps out of fear as well.  There's an emotional aspect of makeup and presenting femme that we need to acknowledge.  The first few times I applied eyeliner was a smudgy mess, and part of that was out of anxiety.  Since I was born a boy, and I live about half of my life presenting as masculine, I was, and still am, deathly afraid of being caught.  I was terrified about applying makeup because what if it didn't wash off completely?  Would someone notice flecks of mascara on my face, even after washing my face?

I suppose part of my fear was/is from remembering that "boys don't wear makeup".  Of course, I think anyone can wear whatever they want, but not everyone feels the same way.  I don't care about what anyone thinks of me or what I wear, but that doesn't mean I want everyone in my life to know what I wear.  There are a few people I know that would make my life very, very unpleasant if they saw traces of eyeliner or my pink panties peeking out of my pants.

A steady hand will come in time.  If you have a shaky hand from nerves please remember that it will steady itself in time.  Your eyes, and your hand holding an eyeliner pencil, are not used to being so close to one another.  Your eye is likely flinching automatically.  But the more often you practice, the steadier your hand will become and the more accustomed your eye will be to what you're doing.  Applying eyeliner is not unlike drawing, and eyeliner is more or less drawing a straight line.  Annnnnd drawing a straight line without a ruler isn't as easy as it sounds.  

But what is easier?  Connecting the dots.

Take your eyeliner and gently make a tiny dot along your eyelid and waterline, like this:

Then instead of drawing one long line, draw short lines connecting the dots.  Join two dots, and then rest.  Then two more, and so on.  

Keep in mind the first few attempts will still look smudgy and might be discouraging.  But again, practice makes progress.  Makeup is challenging, no matter your gender identity.  Be kind to yourself, be patient with yourself.  Try, and then wash off, and try again.  Over and over.  This is how we learn.

Also, liquid eyeliner and crayon eyeliner are different.  Crayon is easier to learn and you should probably start with that, if only to develop a steadier hand.  

Keep in mind that your waterline is very, very, tricky.  

Eyeshadow is a little tricker, in my opinion.  There's a lot that can go into deciding your shade or blending different colors.  We all have different eye shapes and what works for one person isn't going to work for someone else.  This is why makeup tutorial videos can be frustrating and a little disheartening.  The makeup artist very likely has a different eye shape and different skin tone, and what works for them isn't necessarily going to work for you.

Here's how I learned eyeshadow.

I booked an appointment for a makeup lesson with a makeup artist.  Many salons offer this, and you'll have to do some research to see what's available in your area.  You may have to travel a tiny bit to find something.

And yes, this isn't as easy or as cheap as trying to teach yourself and it likely requires going out of your comfort zone.  But our presentation and our appearance is achieved by investing our time and money.  A makeup lesson is part of that.  I still use the same techniques and products that she taught me all those years ago.  

Love, Hannah